a list of priorities and then some

It was one of those days when I'm really tired that even a cup of steaming, delicious and spicy bowl of soup cannot wake me up. I suppose it's because I've been filled with unending and seemingly useless trivialities of life. I had a chance to make a short visit with an old friend yesterday and I realized in her eyes I'm the type who does whatever I like, have I thought of it or not. Simply true. well, maybe not entirely. It's surprising that I haven't found a "Jane" here in Davao. I know there's only one Jane in the entire universe but I'm looking for at least one that's almost like her. I'd settle for an "almost like her." You know someone who uses her brain to think before talking and someone who actually knows what she's talking about and someone who genuinely cares. You might've have noticed that I haven't written anything interesting or at least something you'd spend a minute or two reading. I'll give you an excuse, I haven't done anything news worthy. I'm still doing the same old stuff I did back in Manila only this time there's no Starbucks, Wendy's or Subway. I still live alone. I still go shopping alone. I still don't know who to say no to pleas and favors. I still get easily pissed off at inane conversations. I still make my own fashion statement. I still go to work on foot. I still walk home alone. I still love rain walks. I still haven't found the most delicious bowl of ramen. No, I'm not complaining I'm just bored. this boredom is going borderline crazy.

Last night I went to the mall to buy dinner. I can feel the wind whirling all around and I felt that it's going to rain but I still opted to make my way to SM. Then it rained, heavenly. I've always loved rain and then that night it made me notice how children are like. I don't like hanging out with kids but watching them is something else. I saw someone around the age of 8 who used his flimsy white shirt to cover his head from the angry rain. It didn't do squat. I saw two little girls with their arms outstretched from their bedroom window. I saw a big brother who was protecting his very young sister from the rain and wind. Then I thought, this is very tiring and it's making me sleepy. So i moved on to my next task. How do I reach SM's without getting soaked all throughout. After a minute of personal battle I was able to finish the task without risking broken bones and getting a flu. Hmm, come to think about it, it might have something to do with my bad mood today. Oh before I forget, don't you just hate it when salespeople just wouldn't quit upselling even if you've already said NO a million times? Like even if your face shows how annoyed and uninterested you are they'd still push and push until you either 1.) give in or 2.) scream bloody hell? I've done both, sometimes at the same time, sometimes one at a time. Weird thing is last night I didn't do anything all I did was look at the counter person in the eye and give her a look with a flash of annoyance. Boy, did she move on. So I waved my cash under her nose and said, "Listen, I'm hungry and soaked wet. Please let me have my meal." She quickly rang the register, prepared my meal and pushed the tray towards me. I didn't finish my meal. I felt like throwing up after looking at how disgustingly oily fried chicken is. I ended up buying a meter of purple ribbon and a friendship bracelet. It's for my shirt I'm customizing it yet again. I was told that I looked like a gift and that geeks aren't evil. I didn't give any biting remarks or to be exact I didn't give any remarks at all. yeah, that's how stupid this day is.
Why is it that I have bad mood today? Is it because I'm in the freakin' priority for calls list or because my crush didn't say hi or goodbye before leaving? Or is it because I woke up in the wrong side of the bed? Geez, why am I figuring out why I'm having a bad day. It's not that it's very unusual. And I wonder why I'm wasting my time worrying about this?
I want to talk to Yan. I know I'm pouring salt to an open wound wishing that but still...
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I was received an unexpected gift a few days back. Guess what, it's a book. A book that I actually want to read. I was so happy when I got it. Really.
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This weekend I'm planning on roaming around Davao to look for a good place to eat. I want something different. No more pasta pizza shit. I don't want to go back to that freakin' fake Turkish restaurant though, very disappointing. I guess I should stop typing. My back hurts. My head hurts.
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A few minutes later.
I was just thinking why is it that every time I want to leave people would ask me to stay but when I'm gone nobody cares or lifts a finger about it? I'd love to waste my time in something completely foreign to me tomorrow. Something where it will require me to think and act without getting pissed off. I want to do something that will make me smile later.
Another question, why is it that in Davao they pride themselves as being one of the livable (read: pinapatay ang mga gago) cities and yet it's impossible to walk from home to work without me having to witness kids, drunk kids, playing tennis using bottles of beer as the ball and their bodies as the racket? And may I add, running into a drunk shirtless guy who would actually try to stick his face in my own darned business? A follow up question, why on earth am I complaining? I know why, it's because I hate being messed with. I hate it when people bother me. I hate it when things doesn't go my way. Yes, it's my way or the highway. Yes, that's how bossy I am. Yes, I admit how bitchy I could get.